NEW YORK CITY – FSA-worshipping Trotskyists are expressing outrage on Facebook and reportedly readying an adorable petition against Jacobin for publishing a summary piece about Syria entitled “the War on Syria” by one Patrick Higgins.
“This piece is Baathist propaganda, pure and simple. Jacobin should be jailed.” wrote Thomas Polanski, a New York-based veteran activist whose Facebook cover photo consists of members of the supposedly powerful Vietnamese Trotskyist movement that once existed, along with some text condemning Ho Chi Minh.
The piece, which accuses the Baath party of former collaboration with the US due to their mutual anti-communist interests, and contains a glowing appraisal of the Kurdish national liberation movement in Syria, has been judged to be deeply offensive regime propaganda by Facebook-active academic revolutionaries in top graduate programmes across the United States.
“Who’s Patrick Higgins? More like Assadrick Baathiggins, am I right?” read another deeply informed comment, posted by one Janet Smith, a young activist affiliated with “Solidarity” in Los Angeles.
Several “tankies” attempted to defend the piece, but were quickly shut down by the fierce and revolutionary rhetoric of bourgeois Trotskyists defending armed forces affiliated with the NATO/GCC-created SNC, whose leadership is unelected.
“Oh sure… [Higgins] defends the Kurds, and also talks the way Syrian Kurds talk about the situation in Syria, but he’s clearly a propagandist for the Arab nationalist Baath party and doesn’t really understand Syria the way I do from reading my party’s newspaper and watching pro-US news sources.” said Polanski.
“The Syrian Revolution is real. If I keep saying that, it’s true. There are no Islamists in Syria outside of ISIS. The FSA are all feminist secularist socialists who read Trotsky in their spare time. Anyone who says Assad is no worse than the Arab opposition is a tankie.” Smith wrote.
“What we really need is to put them in touch with like the five Syrian ‘activists’ I know, huddled in fear in their apartments, in the middle of a civil war.”
MLPD chairman Stefan Engel responded to the controversy: “So the Spartacist League likes ISIS, and the rest of the Trotskyites like the FSA? They are bending over backwards to avoid Rojava, aren’t they?”
Syrian president Bashar al-Assad praised Higgins’s piece as a perfect representation of his own assessment of Syria, and outlined his plans for an invasion of Czechoslovakia later this year, assisted by the PYD, provided his plans are not foiled by angry Facebook posts.