LONDON – Having failed to drive Muslims out of the UK by actually fucking a pig, David Cameron has elected to try to tear recent immigrant families apart by deporting women who fail to be fluent in multiple languages like David Cameron himself is.
Support for the reactionary stance is high among segments of British society which, according to CPGB-ML chairman and known Corbyn wannabe Harpal Brar, themselves lack a rudimentary command of the English language.
“It’s not that I explicitly disagree with David Cameron on the question of whether or not everyone in Britain ought to speak in English at all times. It’s just that as a reactionary, he has a clear racial or sectarian bias on who to scold for this.
“A cursory review of the comments section of any article in any British newspaper on the subject of immigration will reveal that anti-immigrant hysteria correlates quite strongly with a sloppy command of English grammar and spelling, innit?”
Stating that when the CPGB-ML “inevitably” comes to power, all British persons not found to speak impeccable English, which is indeed the only official language of the entire United Kingdom at present (the one point of agreement between the Tories and the CPGB-ML), will be “deported”.
“Including the entire Welsh ‘nation’, even if they pass our test,” concluded Brar.
“I hate the fucking Welsh so much.”