BERLIN-PANKOW – What follows is the full text of an invitation received by Worker’s Spatula’s editor-in-chief, [REDACTED 1], from Stefan Engel, chair of the MLPD, chief coordinator of ICOR, greatest friend to the Kurdish national democratic revolution in all of Europe, and winner of the coveted “Largest Sausage” award from the Deutscher Fleischer-Verband:
Dear [REDACTED 1],
In recognition of your great services to ICOR and to the revolution, I, Stefan Engel, wish to personally extend an invitation to my dacha in Bavaria for a fun-filled weekend of drinking, barbecue, discussion of dialectics and the international situation, and swimming (no need to bring a cossie, we are Germans after all).
I hope this won’t be misunderstood, but could we just have the men comrades come down? It’s nothing against the women comrades, but I’m so busy with the women’s wing of the MLPD lately that I want a little “boys’ time”, if you know what I mean. We can have all Worker’s Spatula staff regardless of gender over to my Alpine ski resort in the winter, and we’ll call it even.
You can pick the weekend, I am free most of the summer, and I miss you lads so much since our romp in Tunisia in the winter.
Response from men Worker’s Spatula staff has been mostly positive, and a date is expected to be set soon. Additionally, [REDACTED 2], head of the photoshop division, has informed us that she is “so fucking jealous of you guys”.