LONDON – The central committee of the People’s Marxist-Leninist Communist Party of Great Britain (Proletarian Action), the latest anti-revisionist microsect to emerge in the UK, met today at their headquarters in Highbury to discuss the state of the women’s movement in that country, and to pay tribute to the personage of the great Bolshevik Clara Zetkin.
Stating that the women’s movement was “very important”, the twelve-member party’s eight central committee members, who are all men, read aloud a prepared statement on the importance of Clara Zetkin’s theoretical and practical work, which they indicated “should serve as an inspiration to the party in our resolute struggle against feminism and for real women’s liberation [… after the revolution].”
A large portrait of Clara Zetkin was then produced from a back room and hung on the wall below the portraits of Marx, Engels, Lenin, and Stalin.
The floor was then opened up to the four non-central committee party members, each of whom stated that this was a good and correct action, and that they would certainly redouble their efforts to study important Bolshevik leaders such as Clara Zetkin, and hopefully they would recruit a woman to the party at some point.
The central committee then announced the topics for next week’s meeting:
-Why the Welsh are not a nation
-Why Scotland must never secede from the UK
-The formation of a new international after our Wikipedia research on ICOR led us to the conclusion that they are reformist scum
-Commemorating the partisans who died fighting fascism
-Condemning the Rojava social contract as bourgeois feminist idealism
-Why Trotskyites and the Communist Party of Britain are ruining everything
Afterwards, the twelve-man party rose from their chairs and proceeded to the refreshments table, at which they condemned various trends in the women’s movement at home and abroad for not living up to their revolutionary standards of women’s liberation.